I just need to Bitch

Long story short my mother in law is crazy! I swear she is in love with my husband...I understand he is her only son but my mother isn't nearly as crazy with my brother. Alright this is going to be long so I'm sorry! When my husband was in basic I lived with his parents...well I would hear her on the phone to her daughter saying that it was all my fault that Chad joined the army and all sorts of stuff. When I found out I was pregnant I had to tell Chad on a two minute phone call so he didn't have time to react to what I had said. When I told his mother how he acted when I told him she said "Well he probably figures he can't be mad while he is away." I couldn't believe that! She was acting like I tricked him into having a baby with me! Then I did I really bad thing when he got home from basic...He left all the letters she had written to him on the bed...well my curiosity got the best of me and I just wanted to see what she wrote to him because she wrote like three times as many letters as I did! I didn't know what she could have to talk about so much...well it turns out she was talking about me quite a bit. She would tell him everything that I was doing down to what I had to eat at my sisters house. She would also keep him updated on how I didn't clean the bedroom and how I really need to grow up. I did tell Chad that I read the letters and I told him I wouldn't put up with her talking badly about me anymore because I was sick of it. He completely understood. Okay so that was just some background! She doesn't understand boundaries at all. She has been bugging the hell out of me since Chad has left and I am someone who would rather just deal with hard things on their own or only talk to certain people about it. Well today I was wicked tired because I didn't get much sleep last night and I had been cleaning all morning so I was taking a nap. She called me like three times but I didn't answer because I wanted to get some rest. Well then my sister called and she usually just waits until I call her so I answered her call and she was laughing she was like "Are you ignoring someone?" When I didn't answer my mother in law called my sister and was asking why I wasn't answering the phone. It really pissed me off I was going to call her back when I woke up I just didn't want to talk right that second. Is there something wrong with that? I'm a big girl I don't need someone checking up on me nevermind stalking me! I try my hardest not to be rude to her because I don't want to cause problems with her and Chad because I know Chad would take my side. She always says rude things to me but I just let it roll of my back because its his mother but I don't think I am going to be able to keep my mouth shut for too much longer if she keeps this up! Okay sorry everyone I just needed to vent...and I do kinda feel better!

WOW!!!!!!!

That really sucks! The only advice I would have that wouldn't paint you out to be the "evil" daughter-in-law is to let your hubby handle it. If he lets him mom know that he completely trusts you & would rather hear about how the family is doing, not what your doing every minute out of the day, then maybe she will stop the need to check up on you 24/7. Until he says something though she will feel as though she is "helping" him. GOOD LUCK

I know exactly how you feel.

Ty is her only child, she had him at 35 and tried to have babies for a long time. She spoiled the shit out of him his whole life. He was 32 when I met him and she was still going to his house to cook and clean for him. She paid people to keep up with yard work and shoveling. When I moved in, she acted like I wasn't there and didn't matter, she thought she could keep doing what she was doing. She would come to my house to spend time with my daughter and she would move everything in my kitchen to where she wanted it. If you guys have ever seen friends, I'm Monica. She would wash our clothes but do it all wrong, I'm sorry I have to sort it out. She would make little annoying smart ass remarks. She would tell me what to do with my baby, and it didn't help that he would call her with every problem and argument we had. She even told my mom I smoked, telling on me like a 12 year old. I was ready to smack her a few times. Thank God I bit my tounge. My mom gave me some advice.

Have him deal with it, it's his mom. If you get in her face, it's gonna make you look bad. She is after all his mom.
Make sure he doesn't tell her about your guys problems, if he must tell someone he can tell a friend. Also, let him know that she is stressing you out and it's not good for the baby. Tell him how you feel. Don't yell or scream, just talk to him.

I hope things work out for you.

I want to add that my mother in law knows her place now. She stopped paying for his lawn care after I told him the more she did for us, the more she would want to butt in. Now when do we argue we keep it to ourselves.

Ok here I go again...

His mother signed him up to be pen pals with a single woman. I have read the email the woman sent to him and she is definately only after one thing and I dont think she knows that he is married. Chad doesn't plan on writing back and forth with her but still what the hell? He doesnt need a pen pal he can barely keep up with the emails family sends him. They also signed him up to get care packages from people which both Chad and I dont agree with. We think that should be reserved for the soldiers that dont have people at home to send them things. Chad has so many family members that want to send him packages that we feel like he is taking something that would be better served for someone with more need. When I found out about the pen pal I got all worked up because it just seems like it is one thing after another with that woman. Since we have been together she has tried to get us to break up and you would think she would stop for two seconds and realize her son is happily married with a child on the way. I really dont need to deal with her shit anymore because it isnt good for me or the baby. I am about ready to tell her to go f**k herself and leave me alone! I know Chad wouldnt get mad at me but I dont want to put that on him either he really doesnt need to be worried about me while he is over there. I try to ignore her but when she calls and emails ten times a day it is hard to ignore! I really cant take it anymore...

As far as the care packages go, he can find out the group or association, who is going to be sending the care packages and email them to request the packages be sent to a single guy in his unit or to the unit as a whole. He can explain that he wouldn't feel right accepting packages when he already gets so much especially whne there are men & women who do not have the type of support he has.

As far as his mom, just squash it until he gets home. If you have to grin & bear it so be it. If he is constantly worried about you & her it will not be good for anyone. When he gets home you two can stand together united & tell her under NO circumstances will that happen again.

Wow you poor thing. I don't know how you do it...but stay strong, I will keep you and Chad in my thoughts and prayers...and hope his meddling mama gets the fuck out of your business!

Thank you guys so much. It is nice to have a place where I can vent about how much I hate her and you guys won't judge me too harshly!

samismyhero wrote:Thank you guys so much. It is nice to have a place where I can vent about how much I hate her and you guys won't judge me too harshly!

We don't judge eachother here. We are one big group of Friends.

Kelly vent all you want darling.

We are a big family and when one of us needs something the rest of us pull together.